Comments on: 11 Sure-Fire Ways to Stop Sibling Fighting and to Encourage Kids to Get Along

By: Kay

Kay — Mon, 18 Apr 2022 19:37:29 +0000

In reply to Tori. Tori, I know how you feel with two boys of my own that are 16 and 9. I too feel like I have just given up on them getting along and find myself being depressed too. It is so hard being a mama!

By: Lori

Lori — Fri, 24 Dec 2021 09:27:04 +0000

In reply to Tori. Tori, I am sorry to hear all the pain and hopelessness you feel. Your situation is so difficult with two kids that fight and a special needs child. My children are age 7 and 3 and fight constantly and I hope it will get better. I too feel like this is my fault somehow and it's interesting to see you blame yourself too as I do. Being a mom is the hardest job we will ever have. Good luck to the both of us. Let's try and be kind to ourselves too along the way.

By: Tori

Tori — Tue, 13 Jul 2021 16:21:16 +0000

I have 2 girls. My oldest is 16. She is high functioning autistic and has ADHD. My other daughter is 7. They bicker constantly. I’ve tried everything. Nothing works. They refuse to compromise. They both want everything their way and they antagonize each other. I can’t stand it. I’ve had anxiety since I was a child. My family was constantly yelling at each other, hitting each other. My Dad and brother who can’t hear or speak were constantly getting into physical fights. I guess that’s why this just sets me off every time they start. I’ve cried and cried n thought about what a terrible Mom I am. I have even thought they would be better off without me. They don’t act like that with their Dad. They don’t listen to me. It’s like they think I’m their maid/slave. I love them so much. It just breaks my heart. I remember they used to get along and were so sweet to each other. Guess that’s over now. I always wanted a sister but I had 3 brothers. Maybe it’s better that I didn’t have a sister. My brothers were like 15 and 16 when I was born so I’m not used to all of this arguing. My husband said it’s normal n I believe it is sometimes but constantly, NO. We are Christians. I’ve prayed and prayed that they get along and love each other. I guess because of the environment I grew up in I have no confidence or self esteem. I feel depressed. I feel like I just don’t care anymore. I’ve tried and tried n Nothing changes. You would think with the age gap it wouldn’t be so bad but with the autism n ADHD my 16 year old has the maturity of an 11 year old. It’s so hard to parent a special needs child and then a child with no problems. The child with no problems always thinks the child with special needs is getting special treatment. My oldest always blames everything on her sister. She’s not innocent. It irritates me that she’s always so quick to point out what her sister did wrong without admitting she’s just as guilty. Thanks for listening. I just needed to get that off my chest.

By: Seth

Seth — Sun, 11 Jul 2021 14:52:30 +0000

In reply to Kat.

I don’t know all the details, of course and it’s not my business. Just pointing out that if you haven’t looked at familial issues first, boarding school won’t do HIM any good and you’ll really only benefit bc you won’t have to deal with him. Which is fine. I mean, you do you. But they won’t parent him in your place, either. If he acts up there, they’ll kick him out.

By: Jaclyn

Jaclyn — Wed, 16 Jun 2021 19:34:14 +0000

I have four girls, they are all different which will always create arguments and fighting
Punishing each other and hair pulling
I say to them did that help win whatever you where fighting for in the first place and they look like they really have to think
I say the answer is no
Honestly if where all the same wouldnt it it be a boring place
Life is to short for crap as their is more important things you could be doing then this.

By: Brooke

Brooke — Tue, 27 Apr 2021 16:45:37 +0000

I am only 11 years old but me and my brother always fight with each other and I just don’t feel like I can get along with my brother. When we fight, I don’t even realize. I try not to fight but when we start my body just takes control of me. Usually when I start the fight it is only because I am being nosey and butting into my brothers business, and when my brother starts the fight he takes things from me or calls me names. My mom is so unhappy with this and I just wish we could stop fighting because sometimes I see how stressful it is to take care of two children fighting. I don’t like fighting since sometimes my brother tends to get really mad at me and punch me, but then I am always the one who ends up getting in trouble. But we both still get in trouble I just don’t understand why I get in trouble and I feel like sometimes that is making it worse. I just really need help and hopefully I can find someone that can help me so if anyone knows what I can do to help stop this please let me know.

By: Kat

Kat — Thu, 24 Dec 2020 06:13:41 +0000

I’ll certainly try some of these suggestions. Two days ago my 8 year old and 3 year old sons were arguing, as they constantly do, and my 8 year old slammed his brother into a wall. When I went into the room my 3 year old was screaming and had blood running down his head and face, on his arms and on the floor, My 8 year old calmly sat there and said, “well, he wouldn’t share his toy with me.” He had no remorse. I’m thinking about sending him to boarding school. If he can’t get along normally with his brother in a healthy manner, he doesn’t need to be in the house with him. I will try your suggestions though. Thank you.

By: Jurrien Collins

Jurrien Collins — Wed, 24 Jun 2020 04:21:29 +0000

This is great! A small tip for you too – I have been hearing wonderful things about The Danish Way of Parenting. After a long day, it can be easy to get sucked into the negativity that goes along with sibling squabbles and rivalry… We have been trying to focus on the positive interactions between our boys and it really helps. They just light up when they get caught being kind or helpful to each other. You must try this Danish style of Parenting too!!

By: Sue Denym

Sue Denym — Wed, 24 Jul 2019 10:57:01 +0000

My 2year old has gotten physical with my 4 year old before. I find that he does it when he doesn’t know what else to do to make her stop antagonizing him. It’s really the only thing he CAN do!

So, I process the situation separately with both of them and monitor their play from a distance to look for opportunities to help them through these situations.

By: Nicole Mouchka

Nicole Mouchka — Tue, 15 Jan 2019 18:58:19 +0000

This is great! My brother and I fought constantly when we were kids…according to my sister-in-law we were still fighting when they were engage! LOL! And I have experienced much the same with my own kids, although with an 8-year difference in ages, it rarely came to blows. These are some awesome tips and I will be sharing your article with my readers. Thanks!

By: Kathryn

Kathryn — Sat, 11 Aug 2018 15:00:46 +0000

I have a 13 year old on the Autism Spectrum, so he gets stuck on his point and has a hard time seeing others. His older brother though typically wired likes to always be right and this leads to no resolution. I think a I am going to have them sign off on presenting their own sides for 2 minutes each, myself or husband as ref and basically turn it into a debate scenario. I guess we will see how that goes. Often they are not even on opposite sides of issues, but viewing them slightly different. So frustrating!

By: Wendy

Wendy — Sat, 12 Aug 2017 12:43:26 +0000

My girls don’t get physical but the bickering gets to be too much over little stuff. They are very close in age and when I have had enough I ask them… do you see mommy and daddy fight, yell, bickering, (whatever the situation is)? When daddy comes home I’m going to yell, fight, hit, etc. Him and then you can see what and hear what we sound like! Immediately they both start to cry and say, please mommy don’t fight with daddy! This settles the arguing instantly! I do explain that this is how some families live….cursing, hitting, yelling at each other. Do you want to live like that? I liked all of the suggestions in this article! Very helpful…thanks for sharing!